When families experience separation and divorce it is not unusual for the children to become quite angry with the parent who has left.  Children of all ages suffer a very painful loss when their family is changed, they go through a grief process just as their parents do. This process often includes an extended period of anger towards the parent who has left.

It is important that the parent except that their child is angry with them and allow them to work through it.  This can be especially difficult; their child may refuse to have contact with them.

It is the parent’s responsibility to maintain the relationship under these circumstances no matter how painful the child’s rejection maybe. If the child refuses to see the parent, the parent should stay in contact through phone calls, texting, cards, etc. The child needs to be reassured that their parents love them and will always be there for them..

It may take as long as a year or more for the child to come around but the parent should maintain contact on a regular basis. Reassure the child that they are loved and you want to have a relationship with them, but don’t demand or push. Give the child time to grieve and except the change.

Call the Center at 910-452-7370. Visit at “Like” the Community Counseling Center on Facebook.

Jonathan R. Kelley